The Role of Family and Friends in Shaping Your Habits
This chapter explores how family, friends, and social groups shape our habits. It emphasizes the influence of social norms, the desire to fit in, and the tendency to imitate the habits of those around us, especially those who are close, numerous, or powerful. The chapter provides actionable strategies for leveraging social influence to build better habits.
Key Stories & Examples
The Polgar Sisters
Laszlo Polgar raised his three daughters to be chess prodigies, demonstrating the power of a dedicated environment and cultural emphasis on a specific skill. The sisters grew up in a culture that prioritized and rewarded chess above all else, making an obsession with the game seem normal and attractive.
Our environment and the values of our culture significantly influence which behaviors we find attractive and pursue. Social validation, especially from family, enhances motivation.
Solomon Asch Conformity Experiments
These experiments showed that people often conform to group opinions, even when those opinions are clearly wrong. Subjects were willing to deny what they saw to align with the majority.
The desire to fit in can override individual judgment and lead us to adopt habits that are common in our social group, even if they aren't ideal for us.
Mike Massimino's Robotics Class
Astronaut Mike Massimino attended a robotics class where 4 out of 10 students became astronauts. This shows the power of being in a culture that normalizes your desired behavior.
Surrounding yourself with people who have the habits you want to have makes those habits seem more achievable and normal.